My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
My breasts were aching with rage.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
