i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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