I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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