She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
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