Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
