i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Randomize
