Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
Randomize
