I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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