We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
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