so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Randomize
