please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
Randomize
