So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
