I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Randomize
