hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Randomize
