Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize