forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Randomize
