Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Randomize
