Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize
