i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Randomize
