I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
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