The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
