He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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