She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
