My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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