I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
The convent might be a nice break from real life
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