I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
All the doctor said was why
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Randomize
