So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
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