I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Randomize
