Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Randomize