I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
