Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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