you turned your livingroom into a bong?
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Randomize
