I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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