so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Randomize
