remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
