Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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