is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
