I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
Taylor Swift is so right about you.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
