I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
ttyl tear gas
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize