My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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