it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
