She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Randomize