Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
