Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Randomize
