dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
she smelled like a LAN party
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Randomize
