WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
I have demons in me.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize
