I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
no. you can't hotbox the world.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
Randomize