vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
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