Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
Randomize
