I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
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