I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
time to smoke my breakfast
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
